On social media cleansing

 

At some point during Thanksgiving break, I decided to disappear from social media - notwithstanding this blog.  I am quite sure that the circulation is lower than my thousand friends on FB and Twitter, so no worries here.  I finally got fed up with FB's utter lack of transparency with regard to its privacy settings. After finding that it is next to impossible to "hide" my wall, I just decided to hide everything.  I would deactivate my account but I don't want to spark any rumors when my husband's relationship status changes in his newsfeed and I mysteriously disappear.  Folks, it's that bad.  It has nothing to do with parents or relatives knowing my business.  I tell my parents everything about my life anyway, so that's not it.  There are just certain parts of your life that some people have business knowing and certain parts of your life that no one has business knowing.  

Another thing: My job.  I truly enjoy my job.  Some parts of it are stressful but no parts of it belong on FB. Due to the relative ease of publishing on FB and Twitter, I don't always give every post the thought it deserves.  Although labor laws do protect certain types of communication on social media (and rightfully so), the laws do not extend far enough to cover my post about my preferences or dislike for certain ideas that are completely unrelated to my job.  It is truly better to keep many thoughts to yourself.  So, my withdrawal from social media will likely prevent me from thoughtlessly posting something in the heat of the moment that a person with a cooler head would have thoughtfully kept to herself. 

Another thing:  My church.  I do not believe in being one person at church and being another person the rest of the time.  That being said, I am not perfect.  I like a glass of wine or bourbon as much as the next person.  However, I don't know that everyone I know from Sunday school needs to know that I indulged after a hard day at work (see above explanation, as well) and/or that I went out over the weekend.  The urge to "check-in" has proven much too tempting for me.  I lack a certain self-control when it comes to "checking-in."  

Another thing: Being anti-social.  I discovered after watching myself and my family over Thanksgiving that we have all become so rude.  I have noticed a bit of a change when it comes to dinners with friends in the city and when it comes to religious services, parties, etc.  People have begun to put their phones down -- but they're probably still checking them under the table.  It has got to stop.  That disconnected feeling we all get from time to time is real.  No one really connects any more.  We are all no farther than one buzz, ding or vibration away from being distracting, losing our trains of thought and being truly rude to those around us.  I find myself mindlessly waking up to scroll through a newsfeed to see what my friends did in the 6 hours that I was sleeping.  What?! This has got to be the most futile use of my first waking moments of the day.  It's not even real news!  

Not only that, I've noticed that social media frequently offers one the opportunity to make snarky comments with no immediate consequences.  Some comments are overtly rude, others just comments that exclude people who care enough to feel rejected.  I don't get into this with my own friends but I've seen it happen to others. I am also not immune from making a snarky comment under cover of my Twitter handle to get a laugh.  This, too, is a waste of time.  I'm not necessarily condemning criticism of others or finding humor in the ridiculous social situations that technology provides;  however, what is the point?  I struggle to find much social utility or edification in many of the posts I see on social media.  

Exceptions: Photos and updates regarding friends and their babies/families; social consciousness with some utility; current events; non-profits for the benefit of a worthy cause; educational organizations; urging social and/or political involvement.  This list goes on.  FB, Twitter, Google+, etc. - social media can be used for good.  I just haven't seen a great deal of that on my newsfeed lately.  

The plan: My goal is to avoid social media - except for blogs/blogging -- through Christmas.  I want to see how I use my time and whether I feel the pain of being "uninformed."  I also want to find creative and more productive uses of my time.  I have already cut back a little over the past month.  I find myself blogging more, reading a lot more and spending more time with my husband -- real, focused, quality time (well, let's be honest, some of it involves the Real Housewives . . . ).  

I just want to see what happens when I cut back on the "noise" of social media.  Wish me luck! 

Thankful for . . .

My family's pecan orchard and my dad's superior pie-making abilities. :)

I have the best family ever.

Beautiful Thanksgiving Weekend

I'm thankful for sunshine.

Black Friday: worth the hype?

As someone who enjoys shopping on occasion, I can't say that I have ever fully understood Black Friday.  However, I can say that I detest the fact that it has begun invading the sanctity of Thanksgiving.  Thanksgiving is about family, friends, food and appreciation.  (It is also about Americans conning the Indians into eating with them so that they could later con them into stealing their land, Kanye West - style - "Imma let you finish, Squanto.")  We visit with family and friends -- probably (if we are being honest) a little less meaningfully than in years before the onslaught of technology -- for a few hours, stuff our faces, sit around and talk while we wait for dessert, then prepare to race off to Wal-Mart for big screen televisions and Tickle Me Elmos (that is so 4 years ago).  It is utterly distracting.

Alas, does anyone else find that the day most set aside for being thankful all year is tarnished by the fact that K-Mart is open all day on Thanksgiving morning?  Yes, it's fun to look at ads and to see all of the good deals.  I am not immune to the draw of the inch-thick Thanksgiving circulars.  The problem is that immediately after we're finished giving thanks, we've moved on to indulging in pointless consumerism.  It is one thing to seek out a deal or two for a few special items;  it is quite another to purchase tons of things for yourself or others that are either unneeded or truly, if you think about it, unwanted.  I guess that I just have a huge problem with sprinting into Kohl's at 4 a.m. with a wad full of cash, ready to thrust it at the first salesperson who offers me a clock radio or Isotoners.  This is how America got into this situation in the first place!  I just think that being cognizant of where your money goes is important -- especially in an uncertain economy.  Sometimes living on less is more liberating than being surrounded by tons of "stuff."

Anyway, the point is that no, Black Friday is not worth the hype.  I think that I like, eat Mexican for dinner day or make turkey pot pie day, or decorate for Christmas day -- something a little less focused on getting more of what no one really needs.

Home - for a bit :)

Happy Thanksgiving! 

I started out my Thanksgiving with a few texts (not mass -- which I HATE) to family and friends.  Then, I headed out to a greenway-trail in my husband's hometown and ran about 6 miles.  I wanted to pre-emptively burn some calories.  I don't like that gross-over-full feeling you get around 6:00 on Thanksgiving night.  The run definitely helped.  I'm looking forward to another run (or a walk if my husband decides to join me) tomorrow morning before doing a little bit of work and relaxing with family.  

We had some amazing food.  Besides seeing family, who we never get to see often enough, it felt great to be completely disconnected from our exhausting, busy, dirty, crowded, challenging, sophisticated and sometimes, foreign-feeling, lives in Chicago.  I have to admit that every time I return to the south, or anywhere in its proximity since, technically, Indiana is not the South, I always want to hide and stay for awhile.  The south is sort of ingrained in me in a way that is truly difficult to explain.  Some may interpret it as just wanting to be near my family and the people and places I know.  That is certainly part of it.  However, there is something truly good about where I am from.  The people are good.  The food is good.  Life is so simple.  When compared with our daily existence in Chicago, there is no contest.  The sheer number of steps it takes me to get from point A to point B on any given day would have been incredibly overwhelming to me 10 years ago.  That is not to say that everything about the south is perfect.  It is decidedly not perfect.  At times, it is overwhelmingly narrow-minded, hyper (dare I say, faux) religious, short-sighted and inefficient.  However, it is home.  Sometimes, I don't know how it happens, but you just can't divorce the innermost aspects of your persona from the parts of your home that are intricately ingrained in your DNA - if that makes sense.  

A preacher friend of mine once told me, if you're from Kentucky, you're either home or you're forever trying to make your way back there. 

There is more than one way to eat a turkey!!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Andersonville Thrift Store finds

I mean, really? How could you pass up these treats? Dirty Santa, anyone?